silence
there's nothing more to hear
pencil scribbling on paper
the music's disappeared

a scream that can't be heard
though i may seem fine
you hear the shrieks of others
but the silent scream was mine

darkness
there's nothing more to see
suffering in that corner
the struggling one was me

blinded by thier hatred
not a single glance was kind
you turned away unknowing
the silent scream was mine

numbness
there's nothing more to feel
bound only by your ignorance
my wounds are still unhealed

silently i scream it seems...
or you no compassion left
maybe i was damned to silence...
or maybe you were deaf

She can't hide no matter how hard she tries
Her secret disguise behind her lies
And at night she cries away her pride
With eyes shut tight staring at her inside
All her friends know why she can't sleep at night
All her family asking if she's all right
All she wants to do is get rid of this hell
Well all she's gotta do is stop kidding herself

[Linkin Park - Carousel]

I've heard some rumors in my time --- that love can conquer all
It can move mountains --- it can see you through until the end
Lift you up to dance on sun-colored clouds, make a lover out of a good friend.
I've heard love is something magical; happens without cause
Leaves you sometimes feeling hopeless and just a bit lost.

I find myself when I look at you --- I see who I want to be
And as you walk away, I find myself with a lock but not the key.
I reach out my hand to you, but it's thin air I grasp
Just one chance. One chance is all I ask.

Take a leap. Take a dare. And if failure follows after--
Trust that I will still be there. It's a deadly question:
I know that life ain't always fair. But I hope just this once
It won't turn out with me being on my own.

It's a bit peculiar; perhaps a bit out of the norm
But I find magic behind words --- they lift me up and keep me warm.
I'd do anything to change the world --- but I am powerless against the tide
Yet these feelings in my heart I can no longer hide (forgive me)

I'm a fool for believing in miracles and happily ever afters, I know
But it kills me inside to just have to let you go.
Not once did my heart stop loving you --- a special place you've always held
And I knew you were something special since the day I met you.

I would give it all up just to make you smile --
To be the arms that wrap around you that make you stay awhile longer.
I would give it all up just to make you laugh --
To hear it in your voice that true love lasts.

I've heard rumors --- some I held to be true
Love can conquer everything...
So just answer me this...
Why can't I get through to you?

[Inspired by a very dear friend]

to love is to destroy.
and to be loved is to be the one destroyed.

Stand up and take your place among the messed up and insecure
He says hes trying
(Its so unlikely)
And she knows hes lying
We all fall (were we ever standing?)
We all gave up on lives all too demanding
So I'll count the stars and you count my faults
Neither will finish (contridicting lives come to a halt)
And you can tell me you love me; I'll tell you you're wrong
I'll tell you you hate me...And you'll go along
Breaking down is harder than it seems
A new trend of a heart breaking and shattering dreams
Didn't they tell you, didnt you know?
Didnt you realize when the pain didnt go
(Away):
Breathing doesn't mean youre alive
Your heart can be beating as you start the dive
He says hes trying
(Its so unlikely)
And she knows hes lying
Can you look me in the eye and tell me youre fine?
Tell me its nothing, not just another line?
Maybe one day someone will find beauty in my scars
And see them as more than just prison bars
He says hes trying
(Its so unlikely)
So I'll be your virus, and you be my pill
Together forever, eachother we'll kill....

Tennessee Williams once wrote: We all live in a house of fire. No fire department to call. No way out. Just the upstairs window to look out of while the fire burns down the house...with us trapped, locked in it.

[Tennessee Williams]

(The powers proven to end the madness
Upon I take it to end the savage
The rays of light a truth of meaning
To my father the blood is pleading)

(A justice rage for all to feel
With innocent cries and hatred squeals
The gore of evil seems to satisfy
When slain and maimed and pacified)

(My chosen torture makes me stronger
In a life that craves the hunger
A Freedom and a quest for life
Until the end the judgment night)

(Watch the footsteps but never follow
If you want to live tomorrow
Steal a soul for a second chance
But you will never become a man)

[Devil May Cry 3]

somehow I find beauty in our failings,
somehow I find meaning in our lies,
somehow I'm made perfect in this fracture,
your back is begging sweetly for my knives!

She whispers to me,
a mystical voice filled with never-ending pain and misery.
Hauntingly beautiful in her endless torment,
her destructive agony.
Her disillusioned eyes burn through me, searing my soul,
as she begs me to just let her go.

Degraded and defiled, persecuted and thrown out into exile.
She became a soulless being residing in a rotting corpse.
No longer human, not quite a ghost,
but rather a combination of the two filled with remorse.

I look upon her grief stricken face in my dreams,
my heart skipping beats as it picks up the pace.
Growing cold and numb staring in disbelief,
I realize the disgusting truth in shameful disgrace.

I am her,
she is me,
a mind-numbing fact I can’t escape,
a reality that sickens me.

I am the being touched by rot and decay.
I am the one on which the hand of archaic evil chose to lay.
No longer pure, forever soiled,
my soul is damned my body permanently spoiled.

A tainted creature residing in a human shell.
Pathetic twisted being damned long ago to remain in hell.
Neither loved or hated, always alone, forever jaded.

I wrap myself in enslaving solitude.
Locking myself in, effectively shutting everyone out.
I refuse to spread the darkness in me,
I refuse to contaminate anyone with its evil glee.

THIS IS ME, FOR I AM SHE!

Why can't we pause the moment and grasp it and own it?